Maintaining a Good Relationship With Intended Parents While Serving as a Gestational Carrier
Maintaining a good relationship with intended parents while serving as their gestational carrier (surrogate) is crucial for a positive experience for all involved in a surrogacy journey. Here are some tips to help you navigate this unique relationship:
Clear Communication: Establish open and honest communication right from the start. Discuss expectations, boundaries, and preferences openly. Make sure all parties are on the same page regarding important decisions and aspects of the surrogacy journey.
Respect Boundaries: Understand and respect the boundaries set by the intended parents. Some may want regular updates and involvement in appointments, while others may prefer more distance. Clarify these boundaries early on to avoid misunderstandings.
Establish Trust: Trust is essential in any surrogacy arrangement. Be reliable and consistent in your communications and actions. Show the intended parents that you are committed to the process and their goals.
Regular Updates: Keep the intended parents informed about the progress of the pregnancy and any important developments. This can include medical appointments, test results, and general updates about how you are feeling.
Include Them in Milestones: Invite the intended parents to important milestones, such as ultrasound appointments or other significant moments during the pregnancy if they wish to attend or participate remotely.
Respect Their Role: Understand that the intended parents have a deeply emotional investment in this journey. Respect their emotions and viewpoints, even if they differ from your own. They might not want to be as involved as you want them to be. Remember that they have had a hard road.
Be Supportive: Offer emotional support to the intended parents throughout the process. Understand that they may experience anxiety, excitement, and a range of emotions during this time.
Maintain Professionalism: While it's important to build a close relationship, remember that this is also a professional arrangement. Keep communication professional and respectful at all times.
Discuss Post-Birth Plans: Have discussions about plans for after the birth, such as how much contact the intended parents wish to have with the child and how you will transition back to your own life.
Seek Mediation if Needed: If conflicts arise that you cannot resolve on your own, consider involving a mediator or counselor who specializes in surrogacy. They can help facilitate discussions and find solutions that work for everyone. If working with an agency they would also be a great resource to involve.
Celebrate Together: Celebrate milestones and achievements together, such as baby showers or other events, if both parties are comfortable with it. This can help strengthen your bond and make the experience more positive for everyone.
Remember, every surrogacy journey is unique and it's important to tailor your approach to the specific preferences and needs of the intended parents. Clear communication, mutual respect, and empathy are key to maintaining a good relationship throughout this life-changing experience.
Are you curious about what a surrogacy journey might look like for you? Fill out our intake form here and a member of our team will reach out and talk to you about their experience as well as what it might look like for you!